One basic difference between a guy and a girl is the way they think about love. A girl thinks of love in terms of romance and marriage. She wants a guy to love her, cherish her, talk to her, listen to her, and put her on a pedestal. She wants love, protection and security.
A guy thinks of love differently. He thinks of it more in terms of sex. The focus of his attention is the physical body of the girl. He is not daydreaming about romantic love; it is the sexual aspect of the relationship that has his attention. The only time he is truly committed in relationship is when he marry.
There is a reason for this. The time of greatest sexual desire for a guy is in his late teens. His glands are working overtime. This is why he tends to think of love more in terms of sex, but his desire for sex is not an evidence of real love.
Girls, write this down in concrete: Just because a guy wants to have sex with you does not mean that he loves you. We do not want to be too hard on the guys but the fact is that most guys could enjoy sex with anything in a skirt! So do not get all excited just because some guy lets you know that he would like to have sex with you.
Just because a guy wants to have sex with you does not mean he loves you
The peak of a woman’s sexual desires comes later. In a guy-girl relationship, the girl is not thinking primarily about sex. She is thinking about romantic love.
It has been said, “A girl plays at sex, for which she is not ready, because what she wants is love. A guy plays at love, for which he is not ready, because what he primarily wants is sex.”
What the girl primarily wants is love. She wants someone to hold her and tell her that she is special. She wants a committed boyfriend who loves her, someone to talk to and to share her life with. Her love drive is mature.
Her sex drive, however, is not mature. She is not ready for sex and all the dangers and problems that come with it. She knows that it is the girl who gets burned in these matters. She has a lot more to lose than the guy, and she is not ready for all the heavy stuff that goes with a sexual relationship. But she does not want to lose her boyfriend, so she “plays at sex” to get the love she wants and needs.
The guy, on the other hand, is not ready for love. He is not ready for a lifetime commitment. He is not ready for all the responsibilities that go with being a husband and a father. His love drive is not mature at all.
What does the guy do? He “plays at love” in order to get what he primarily wants. He uses words of love and tells the girl what she wants to hear. We do not question his sincerity, but the focus of his attention is on sex. He may sincerely think that he loves the girl, but he does not understand real love. He does not realize how selfish he is in thinking only of his sexual needs.
If a girl is not careful, things can get out of hand very quickly. She gives him an inch and he takes a mile! Before long she is wondering if she is out with a sex maniac. What is the moral lesson you learn? How can a boy control his sex drive and how can a lady say NO to his advances?
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