Understanding the Meaning of a Man's Silence
While some men are considered to be 'talkers', many men tend to be less talkative than women especially in the context of a love relationship. A man's silence may puzzle a woman to the point where it may 'drive her crazy'.
Due to this mystery, she may seek to interpret the combination of his silence, feelings and actions based on the common reasons that would cause her to remain silent. One such example is a case where she is upset with him for some particular reason and gives him the silent treatment perhaps to passively aggressively punish his wits out.
What a woman may learn is that he thinks differently, and though there are a number issues and situations that would cause anyone to be verbally non-communicative, there are two (2) dynamic reasons that can result in a man being silent.
His Way Of Processing Information
She may process things within through verbal communication, whereas he may process things in silence within his 'psychological cave'. This simply means that to work things out mentally and emotionally, women may prefer to talk it out whereas men may prefer to work it out alone. This is the instant that he may withdraw in silence. These things that he wants to work out and fix can range from planning the supplies he needs to fix the roof to how he can satisfy his woman who isn't happy. Silence doesn't necessarily mean disinterest, indifference, passivity, insensitivity or being upset (sad, angry, depressed etc.).
His Challenge To Share His Feelings Verbally
“Women often don’t understand how very hard it is for men to express their feelings. It’s very important for a woman not to come to any firm conclusions about a man’s motivation for what he is saying until she discovers what he is feeling” Myles Munroe
Men can jump out of planes, wrestle with crocodiles and drive at amazing speeds without a hint of fear, but it is a different matter for a number of them when it comes on to sharing feelings . From the perspective of a man, sharing certain feelings may give him an unwanted sense of vulnerability that he may think gives her the upper hand psychologically.
While some men are considered to be 'talkers', many men tend to be less talkative than women especially in the context of a love relationship. A man's silence may puzzle a woman to the point where it may 'drive her crazy'.
Due to this mystery, she may seek to interpret the combination of his silence, feelings and actions based on the common reasons that would cause her to remain silent. One such example is a case where she is upset with him for some particular reason and gives him the silent treatment perhaps to passively aggressively punish his wits out.
What a woman may learn is that he thinks differently, and though there are a number issues and situations that would cause anyone to be verbally non-communicative, there are two (2) dynamic reasons that can result in a man being silent.
His Way Of Processing Information
She may process things within through verbal communication, whereas he may process things in silence within his 'psychological cave'. This simply means that to work things out mentally and emotionally, women may prefer to talk it out whereas men may prefer to work it out alone. This is the instant that he may withdraw in silence. These things that he wants to work out and fix can range from planning the supplies he needs to fix the roof to how he can satisfy his woman who isn't happy. Silence doesn't necessarily mean disinterest, indifference, passivity, insensitivity or being upset (sad, angry, depressed etc.).
His Challenge To Share His Feelings Verbally
“Women often don’t understand how very hard it is for men to express their feelings. It’s very important for a woman not to come to any firm conclusions about a man’s motivation for what he is saying until she discovers what he is feeling” Myles Munroe
Men can jump out of planes, wrestle with crocodiles and drive at amazing speeds without a hint of fear, but it is a different matter for a number of them when it comes on to sharing feelings . From the perspective of a man, sharing certain feelings may give him an unwanted sense of vulnerability that he may think gives her the upper hand psychologically.
With the knowledge of how men process information and the challenge they have with sharing feelings, women can exercise more patience through understanding. Some basic ways in which a woman can understand what is beneath his silence is to:
- ask him what he is thinking and feeling.
- give him time to share at his own pace.
- avoid giving the ‘silent treatment’ to follow suite with his silence.
- let him know how important his feelings are to you.
- continue to share your feelings to encourage him to do the same.
A man can make it easier for a woman to understand his silence by letting her know a little of what is happening on in his soul. His blank silence can frustrate her need to communicate with him. From her perspective, she feels close to him not only when she hears his logical thoughts, but his feelings as well.
