A WOMAN OF DISCRETION

“As a ring of gold in a swine’s snout, so is a lovely woman who lacks discretion” (Proverbs 11:22).

Being indiscreet is a very serious flaw—one that can even ruin a woman’s reputation. It can also bring shame to her husband. “An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones” (Proverbs 12:4).

What is discretion? Here is a marvelous quality, for lacking it can turn a beautiful woman into an ugly pig. Discretion is the ability to discern or distinguish what is right, befitting, or advisable for one’s own conduct. It is propriety of behavior; civility, courtesy; judicious, prudent, circumspect, and cautious conduct; especially that can be silent when speech would be improper. Discretion is ability to be proper at all times, in all situations.

Discretion is part of wisdom, the power of right judgment, and part of understanding, the power of right discernment (Pr 1:4; 2:10-17; 3:21; 5:1-2; Gen 41:33,39). Discretion is generous to others (Ps 112:5). It rejects wicked conduct by others (Pr 2:10-17). It rules the spirit to defer anger (Pr 19:11). It knows how each situation calls for different conduct (Is 28:23-29). It is prudent application of wisdom to speech and actions.

A WOMAN WHO LACK DISCRETION

How can a woman be without discretion? She can be irritating in speech or action. She argues or nags. She has opinions without being asked. She is self-righteous, gets angry easily, is moody, or loves to second-guess others. She is petty, prudish, or political. She cannot calm down, sit still, or be quiet. She loves to meddle or needle. She reveals her spirit by spoiled body language.

She asks questions about every matter brought up. She pouts if she does not get her way. She waits for her husband to apologize to her. She thinks she was created to be her husband’s second conscience.

She loves to talk, question, suggest, or remind. She is critical, negative, or picky. She values worthless trivia. She corrects her husband for dates and other irrelevant facts. She loves to pick lint off his suit like he is a seven-year-old boy. She is childish, nosy, or inquisitive. She thinks she is attractive, criticizes others, expects her own checkbook, or cannot forgive instantly and completely.

She is a Queen of Virtue

A woman with discretion is a gracious woman, which Solomon exalted (Pr 11:16). She always knows how to act, and she does it in such a way as to be delightfully charming to all those around her, all the time. Good men and women always hold this desirable creature in the highest regard. She is always honored, and men are very blessed when married to this queen of virtue. Wise men will only marry discreet and gracious women. And if such a woman is also beautiful, heaven has smiled upon the man with two suns!

She disagrees with her husband in public. She cries over nothing. She overreacts to rumors or minor events in her life. She always has an experience to tell. She can find something negative about everything. She keeps a cluttered house. She does not have a clue when she irritates people; she does not grasp social decorum. She is too bold, too forward, too loud, and too opinionated. She is a pain.

Proverbs 11:22 "As a ring of gold in a swine’s snout, so is a lovely woman who lacks discretion".

A beautiful woman without discretion - modesty, wisdom, and grace—is compared to a pig!

A pig is an animal who roots around in garbage, an animal that you can clean up, but who will go right back to the pig style! The beauty of a woman without discretion is like a jewel put in the nose of an animal that pokes around in the slop!

Can you imagine yourself getting married to a pig?

What are the consequences of neglecting this advice? You will live your life in marital hell. You will experience pain worse than death itself. You will try to hide your horrible blunder from public view, but your odious wife cannot be hid (Pr 27:15-16).

MEN, DO NOT MARRY A WOMAN WHO LACK DISCRETION

Young man, do not let beauty deceive you. Do not fall for a woman’s eyes or other bodily features (Pr 6:25). Pick a wife by her ability to act perfectly at all times – in the fear of the Lord and with a meek and quiet spirit (Pr 31:30; Ec 10:1). The precious jewel of a gracious spirit exceeds the luster of physical beauty as sunlight to moonlight, and the gracious woman gets better with age, while the model corrupts to fat, gray, and wrinkles!

It is your grave duty, with the Holy Spirit help, to measure a woman’s spirit, not her body. A beautiful exterior often hides a depraved and deformed heart. What will you do with a beautiful wife that is always just out of reach, friendlier to other men, always irritated at home, or always irritating at home? A dentist’s chair is a more pleasant place! But a pure and gracious spirit will turn an average looking woman into a glorious lover and friend.