Part Four of "When Love Is Gone, Where Does It Go?"
1 Peter 3:7 “HUSBANDS, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving HONOUR to the wife”.
Eph 5:21-22 “submitting to one another in the fear of God. Wives, SUBMIT to your own husbands, as to the Lord”.
These two passages point to two commands “TO HONOUR”, which means to respect the privacy of your marriage and submit to your partner in everything just the same way you submit to the Lord. Both husband and wife have the same promise. If we do what God commands, our spouses will be pointed to God. When we are not getting along with our spouses, only one of us need to take a first step and adopt God’s respective command in order to reap the benefit of God’s promise.
So why should women honour their husbands? Men rate honour higher than love. Men desire respect, not love. God designed women to affirm the men in their lives. Women, let the Lord speak to you now. Your husband may have missed nine out of ten things, but affirm and speak well of him on that one thing that he did well, and as the Bible teaches, he will be changed without you preaching to him. In 1 Peter 1:3, Apostle Peter encourage wives to “be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the BEHAVIOUR of their wives.
Women, the challenge for you is to HONOUR your husband who is not perfect. Many times husbands will not come to church because the wife who is a Christian will reveal her marriage problems to the church in prayer meeting after prayer meeting. This only mines the field and serves to dishonour your husband. It’s not everybody who attend Church is born again. Some will use your situation and turn back on you. Their words of criticism and mockery might backfire and reach the hearing of your husband. This will damage his reputation and make him feel dishonoured.
Secondly, you dishonour your husband when you share your marital problems with your friends or family members. Once the man is aware of it, he feels stupid before them. So, I want you to ask yourself, “Am I condemning my husband before others or honouring him by affirming his good part?” Prov 31:23 said about the virtuous woman, “Her husband is known in the gates, When he sits among the elders of the land”. Is your husband well spoken of at your church, before your friends and family members? Or he is dishonoured and regarded as a stupid, useless man?
The devil wants you to focus on what he has done wrong, but God is commanding us to do the opposite. Affirm what he has done right! Avoid sharing your marital problem with friends, church prayer meetings, but take the problems to God in prayers or meet a trained and experienced counsellor. Rom 13:7 “Render therefore to all their due: taxes to whom taxes are due, customs to whom customs, fear to whom fear, honour to whom honour”.
So why should women honour their husbands? Men rate honour higher than love. Men desire respect, not love. God designed women to affirm the men in their lives. Women, let the Lord speak to you now. Your husband may have missed nine out of ten things, but affirm and speak well of him on that one thing that he did well, and as the Bible teaches, he will be changed without you preaching to him. In 1 Peter 1:3, Apostle Peter encourage wives to “be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the BEHAVIOUR of their wives.
Women, the challenge for you is to HONOUR your husband who is not perfect. Many times husbands will not come to church because the wife who is a Christian will reveal her marriage problems to the church in prayer meeting after prayer meeting. This only mines the field and serves to dishonour your husband. It’s not everybody who attend Church is born again. Some will use your situation and turn back on you. Their words of criticism and mockery might backfire and reach the hearing of your husband. This will damage his reputation and make him feel dishonoured.
Secondly, you dishonour your husband when you share your marital problems with your friends or family members. Once the man is aware of it, he feels stupid before them. So, I want you to ask yourself, “Am I condemning my husband before others or honouring him by affirming his good part?” Prov 31:23 said about the virtuous woman, “Her husband is known in the gates, When he sits among the elders of the land”. Is your husband well spoken of at your church, before your friends and family members? Or he is dishonoured and regarded as a stupid, useless man?
The devil wants you to focus on what he has done wrong, but God is commanding us to do the opposite. Affirm what he has done right! Avoid sharing your marital problem with friends, church prayer meetings, but take the problems to God in prayers or meet a trained and experienced counsellor. Rom 13:7 “Render therefore to all their due: taxes to whom taxes are due, customs to whom customs, fear to whom fear, honour to whom honour”.
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