YOU CAN TRUST AGAIN: Do you have the problem of trust?

I thought to myself, “I forgive her.” That was a good start. Then, I said to the Lord, “Lord, I love her. But I don’t trust her. I don’t trust her because she hurts me in the past and I have fear that she might do so again.” Through the years, I have heard numerous sermons and received many teachings saying this was theologically alright. If someone hurt you, God required you to forgive them and to love them, but until they had demonstrated a change, walked it out in their lives, and shown themselves trustworthy, you didn’t have to trust them. The Lord, however, seemed to be disagreeing with this theology. He told me to read 1 Corinthians 13. “I know that chapter, Lord,” I protested, “I’ve read it a thousand times.” God’s response was clear and concise, “READ IT!”

As I began to read this chapter in my Bible, I become oblivious to everything else going on around me. I was no longer just struggling with that lady who broke my heart and now coming to me for help; I was now wrestling with God. When I got to the seventh verse, “Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres,” something happened that has only happened to me a few times before in my life. The words “always trusts” seemed to ignite, enlarge, and explode off the page all at the same time. The Lord spoke to my heart that unless my love includes trust, it is not His love. He showed me that although favor is an area we grow in, we do not grow in trust — it is a gift we are to give! Godly love does not give forgiveness while withholding trust. If I insist on determining when another deserves my trust, I am making myself the lord of my heart — a dangerous and idolatrous thing to do. The Lord told me that because of His faithfulness I should be willing to trust those whom He is restoring. So, I responded to the Lord, “Yes Lord, I choose to trust her.” The word trust in 1 Corinthians 13:7 is the Greek word “pisteuo,” which means “to believe in, place confidence in, or rely upon in the sense of being committed to something or someone.” The love we are to have for each other as believers is a committed love. It is love that believes in others and is willing to rely upon them, even when they have let us down and disappointed us. Our love is to be confident that the next time they will fare better. The love that comes from God gives trust to those who have not earned it, and restores trust to those whom it forgives. Restore means “to bring back into existence, to bring back to the normal condition.”

This “trusting” part of love overcomes many difficulties. It binds together when the enemy would cause division. When Satan brings accusation and suspicion, trust brings forbearance and believing the best. Trust overcomes division and fear of rejection. It is not self-protecting. It says, “Though you have been untrustworthy, I refuse to discard my relationship with you just to protect myself.”

Satan knows that a united, loving relationship would easily overpower him. Therefore, he is constantly coming against the loving trust God would have us possess. 

Even though trust was no longer in existence, trust was the “normal condition” God wanted me to have. The Lord wanted me to lay down my rights, and to choose to trust him. I was called to have a greater love than I had before. “Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends” (John 15:13). I believe this is a great picture of Job 13:15, “Though he slay me, yet will I trust him.” When we have God’s great love, we will help fulfill the hopes and dreams of others despite of how trustworthy they have been toward us. This is laying down your life for a friend.